This Is Just Too Much Fun!!

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Disco Inferno 2

I don't know why, but whenever I would try to add comments to the video post below, the video link would get messed up. So, I'll tell you here that video makes me laugh so hard I want to pee my pants! You have to check that site out and play with it. I just don't know why I have a floating head?!?!?

Disco Inferno

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Regina Phalange

Okay, so I was trying to find a quiz that tells you which Friends character you are. Now, I didn't really like this quiz as it was totally obvious which answer was related to which character. So when I tried to do Phoebe on purpose....

This is the picture....

Uhm...
I guess I'm more like Phoebe than I realized?
Anyone else see the resemblance????? (ignore the ginormous head)

Scary.

But, I do kinda like the description:
"you're phoebe...completely off the wall and scatter brained, but your friends know you'll always be faithful to them, no matter what."

I don't think I'm scattered brained and I probably wish I could be more off the wall than I am. But I hope my Friends would agree with the faithfulness.

"P - as in Phoebe
H - as in Hee-Bee
O - as in O-Bee
E - as in E-Bee
B - as in Bee-Bee
E - as in 'Ello there mate!"

"They don't KNOW that we know they know we know!"

(Oh, I'm dieing laughing. hee hee)

"The messers, become...the MESS-EES!!!"

(A ha ha ha, {snort} ha ha ha)

Signing the Marriage Certificate

Thirteen years ago I travelled with my parents to Canada for Joy and Geoff's wedding. This was my first time attending a wedding in Canada. It was held outside along the water and was just beautiful. One thing that took place during the ceremony was the bride and groom sat down at a table and signed their marriage certificate. This was new to me and I was intrigued.

My parents and I referenced it often and think I always had in the back of my mind the idea of doing that when I got married. I was shocked to notice how insignificant this process was in the weddings I was in. In one wedding it was signed the night of the rehearsal after we were done rehearsing. In another wedding it was signed on the back of the best man in the parking lot as we walked across it to take pictures. And because this piece of paper is what actually makes the marriage legal, I just felt that is should have greater significance during the wedding ceremony.

When it came time to plan my wedding with Jim, I shared the idea with him and he liked it. We used a beautiful table linen that had belonged to my grandma and placed the toss-bouquet on the table. The funny thing was, things are a little different here in America. We had to sign the marriage license when we bought it at the courthouse. The only signatures it needed were the witnesses and the pastor. So we decided to also have a "momento" marriage certificate to sign. Long-story-short, things didn't quite work out the way I planned and Jim and I didn't end up signing anything during the ceremony. But it was still a lovely part of the ceremony and I'm glad we included it.


Being at Darcy and Holly's wedding we got to see this happen again. I think I will make it my crusade to get American's to make this a normal tradition. And if that doesn't work, maybe I'll just move to Canada.

Oh, Canada!

Jim and I have returned from our relatively quick trip to Canada. My cousin Holly was married on Saturday and we were so excited to be able to be there for the event. Jim had met Holly very briefly the day after he proposed to me four years ago while she had a layover at LAX on her way home from (I think) Taiwan. On this trip he got to meet her twin sister Joy and their mother (my aunt) Sharon.

Thursday was a long travel day starting at 4am. UGH! We took a car to the airport – the plane to Seattle – a rental car to the ferry – the ferry from Vancouver to Victoria (ish) – and the car to the house. We finally arrived at the rehearsal dinner just after 6pm. It was nice to meet Holly’s fiancé, Darcy, and the extended friends and family.

Friday we had a little family hike down to the beach. Then Jim and I went to Butchart Gardens which is simply beautiful. Great photo opportunities, but for some reason I was having little patience with my camera – maybe it had something to do with the blazing heat/humidity and lack of water.


Then we went to Joy and Geoff’s house where the twins were working on the wedding cake and other preparations. I helped a little with the frosting of cake and watched how to do the lattice work that looks so pretty on the outside of cakes. Here is the bride herself decorating the cake.


I also fell in love with Joy and Geoff’s two kids, Liam (6) and Nichole (4). They are beautiful children and a joy to be around. That little Nichole just charmed the pants off of me.

I decided I wanted to take home the following from Joy and Geoff’s: Their two kids. The two Siamese / Burmese cats Riley and Rio (sorry no pics of these beauties). And their two Adirondack chairs – Moooey comfie!!

Saturday was the big wedding day. It was a perfect day for a beach wedding and I think everything went well. The guests were heavily populated with big-deal cameras – it was quite amusing. I’m sure there will be bazillions of fantastic shots.



Sunday was just family time. We went to downtown Victoria where there was a Dragon Boat Race festival. What a hoot this was to see.

Jim, my mom and I took a tour of the Parliament building.



After dinner we all looked at wedding photos that we had taken.

Monday was another big travel day starting at 7am and ending at 10pm. But Jim and I were ahead of schedule all day so we took some detours and just enjoyed our time.

I may spend a couple of post in more detail on other stuff. But you can see tons of more pictures on my Flickr sight. Just click on the slideshow on this page and it will take you right to it.

Overwhelmingness

Dr. K called yesterday. I like him. Have I mentioned that before? He asked how my weekend was. How nice is that? Yes, I like him. He said he had done some research and spoke with some people and now has the opinion that it will be okay for me to have fertility treatments. We’ll just need to monitor my liver closely which would involve blood tests every other week during the treatments and every month during pregnancy. He had already left a message for my OB-GYN.

I missed the OB’s call last night, but she left a message saying she was okay putting me on Clomid. She will be on vacation the next two weeks, but when I start my next period, I need to see her within the first five days.

What a complete transformation. Just a couple months ago I was feeling surrounded by dead-ends and closed doors. I was having a hard time holding on to the hope. And now I feel I have options. I have been doing a lot of reading and fact gathering and feel better equipped than I have throughout this process. Jim and I have a lot to talk about and decisions to make.

• Are we sure we want to do Clomid? (I know, seems strange to be asking at this point)
• Do we want to start it with my next cycle?
• Do we want to do Clomid only?
• Do we want to do Clomid with IUI?
• Do we want to try IUI first without Clomid?
• How many times do we do Clomid alone and then combine it with IUI?
• When do we consider IVF?
• Do we consider IVF?
• ???????

As much as I feel overwhelmed by the options, I am grateful to have this kind of overwhelmingness (my new word I invented for today). At this point we probably will wait at least one more cycle before using Clomid. We want to have the ultrasound results and the endocrinologist’s blood test results before we make any definite decisions about anything. And it is likely that between our travel and the OB’s vacation, timing might be a little screwy any way.

God will provide.

God Provides

Our pastor is teaching on Elijah for the next four weeks and this past Sunday he shared his story of God’s provision. The passages read were 1 Kings 17:1-16. The story tells of when Elijah is hiding from Ahab after predicting a drought. Initially God tells Elijah to hide by a brook which will provide him with water and God has the ravens provide the bread. Then when the brook dries up due to the drought, God uses a widow to provide water and bread for Elijah. However, the widow is down to her last bit of flour and oil and is about to make her last cake of bread and then wait for death. But God provides for all:

8 Then the word of the LORD came to him, saying, 9 “Arise, go to Zarephath, which belongs to Sidon, and stay there; behold, I have commanded a widow there to provide for you.” 10 So he arose and went to Zarephath, and when he came to the gate of the city, behold, a widow was there gathering sticks; and he called to her and said, “Please get me a little water in a jar, that I may drink.” 11 As she was going to get it, he called to her and said, “Please bring me a piece of bread in your hand.” 12 But she said, “As the LORD your God lives, I have no bread, only a handful of flour in the bowl and a little oil in the jar; and behold, I am gathering a few sticks that I may go in and prepare for me and my son, that we may eat it and die.” 13 Then Elijah said to her, “Do not fear; go, do as you have said, but make me a little bread cake from it first and bring it out to me, and afterward you may make one for yourself and for your son. 14 “For thus says the LORD God of Israel, ‘The bowl of flour shall not be exhausted, nor shall the jar of oil be empty, until the day that the LORD sends rain on the face of the earth.’” 15 So she went and did according to the word of Elijah, and she and he and her household ate for many days. 16 The bowl of flour was not exhausted nor did the jar of oil become empty, according to the word of the LORD which He spoke through Elijah.

Our pastor suggested that as a reminder of God’s eternal provision that we take a couple jars and put a little flour in one and a little oil in other then set it on the table for the next four weeks. One of the points our pastor focused on was the widow’s faith being tested by her being asked to provide for this stranger before taking care of her own family. By being obedient, God blesses her.

As I was making dinner last night, Jim was sharing some things he is struggling with at work. It reminded me of the jars and I put the ingredients in them while he was talking. As I set them on the table I said “God will provide.” We struggle with so many decisions – financial, future plans, career path, family, etc. – that I do feel the importance of remembering to trust in God’s provision both physically and emotionally. Already, every time I see the jars on the table, I say to myself, “God will provide.” It’s amazing how assuring and calming that is. I would encourage anyone reading this to read Elijah’s story in 1 Kings and place these jars on your own table as a reminder. I’m not sure how long we’ll keep our jars on the table; maybe just the fours weeks, but maybe longer. There is something so tangible about seeing those jars on the table.

When It Rains, It Pours

The idle time of waiting for some sort of progress with doctors has dramatically shifted into a busy week. Here was my today:

5:45 am – Woke up and took ovulation test.
A little background on this ovulation test: It’s the digital kind from Clear Blue Easy. It counts the days and tells you which days to test. There are three phases: low (no surge in hormones); high (hormones starting to surge, leading to ovulation), peak (you should ovulate within 24-36 hours). This is the first month I have used it and as of yesterday we were at day 25 and still hitting the low mark. I was getting discouraged. Is it broken? Am I broken? Do my hormones really not do what they are supposed to and that’s been the problem all along?

Today the test came back as "peak". Good Grief! How did we miss “high”? (I may have messed up a little with the tester, I now know better.) And to put the cherry on top, Jim is out of town. He hasn’t travelled for work in nearly eight months and has been so antsy about that. He finally gets a two day trip and I hit peak right in the middle of it. He’s right – God really has a sick sense of humor.

My primary doctor gave me a referral for an ultra sound to be done when I think I’m ovulating. Since I can’t ever tell physically, I have been waiting for the monitor to tell me. So now I have to decide if I should try to go in today or tomorrow

7:00 am – Go to the lab to have the blood tests for endocrinologist.
I was afraid it was going to be ten vials like one of my girlfriends had which made her pass out. Luckily it was only two.

7:55 am – Call to schedule ultrasound.
They couldn’t get me in tomorrow and were looking at next week. I explained my situation and I was put on hold. She comes back on the phone and asks if I can be there at 10:15 am today. So now my day is starting to flip upside down, but as Tim Gunn says, I will “make it work”. She explains the prep I need to do by drinking water.

9:07 am – Received call from Dr. K (the liver doctor I like)
Have I mentioned how much I like him? He just starts off with some really friendly banter. I essentially just wanted to open up the questions again regarding fertility treatments / Clomid. Since my liver has been doing pretty good for six months, what is his opinion now? Essentially he is going to consult with another doctor and get back to me hopefully within a week. There is concern that the medication could affect my liver; but conversely, being pregnant sends the PSC symptoms into remission. So it’s a fine line.

I also re-asked the question to him regarding being sick last month and when I should be concerned. He asked me if I had some specific symptoms – all of which were “no” – and then said that those symptoms are really the ones to be concerned about being PSC related. Otherwise my body is just fighting harder when I get sick. Now, why couldn’t Dr. Stupid-Head have told me that? That was the answer I needed!!

9:15 am – Start drinking water

10:15 am – Arrive at medical center

10:35 am – REALLY HAVE TO PEE!

10:45 am – Ultrasound
The technician was very friendly but I wanted to kick her in the shin every time she pushed on my bladder. It’s a very sadistic procedure, especially for someone with a “pea-size bladder” as my husband always likes to tell me.

Praise You in This Storm

I have always been attracted to songs that can so perfectly describe where I am in life or what I am feeling. I am not a poet and I am usually awed by someone's ability to put emotions into words. Below are the lyrics to a song that I was exposed to for the first time last week when my friend Mark shared his story at work about a serious car accident he was in a year and a half ago. This song spoke to him during that time. It speaks loudly to me now.

Praise You In This Storm
Casting Crowns

I was sure by now, God, that You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it's still raining
as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.

Chorus:
And I'll praise You in this storm
and I will lift my hands for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
You hold in Your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise you in this storm

I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on
if I can't find You
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.

Chorus

I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth.
I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth.

Chorus

Dr. Stupid-Head

Well, I had hoped to get all up to date on the history of my medical journey before my next doctor appointment, but that has not happened. But I don't want skip sharing today's events. So you will have to forgive me as I will have to go Back to the Future in later posts.

THE LIVER DOCTOR APPOINTMENT
This morning I had my 3-month check up with the liver doctor. My previous appointment had me meet with a different (new) doctor - Dr. Stupid-Head - that I was not very happy with. I told my regular liver doc, Dr. K, about my frustrations with Dr. Stupid-Head and he told me how I could make sure to see him (Dr. K). So when I called to confirm this appointment, they told me it would be with Dr. K. I was extremely disappointed when Dr. Stupid-Head walked in this morning.

He said my liver scores are basically holding steady. I would share the numbers, except I accidently left my copy with my second appointment of the day (which we'll get into shortly). I had questions to ask the liver doc and this is where the frustrations ignite. Since I was really sick last month with a low fever that came and went for five days I wondered if/when I should get concerned in those cases. I've never been sick like that before, so what should my mind set be? His response was "That's not related to anything [meaning treatment] we are doing." But, uhm, that wasn't my question.

Let's try another question: "I am meeting with an endocrinologist later this morning. I will obviously tell her about what's going on here, but would you recommend any key points I should make sure she knows?" The response..."Endocrinologist...that's bones, right?" He then proceeds to tell me how PSC affects bone density (information I already know).

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!? How did this guy graduate medical school without knowing what the endocrine system is?!?!? I said, "Never mind, if you don't know, just forget it." And I shut down and just wanted to get out of there. How could I ask any other questions when I don't trust that he knows anything he's talking about and he seems overly anxious to schedule my next colonoscopy. When the nurse was scheduling my next appointment she asked if I wanted to see Stupid-Head or Dr. K. I let her know very clearly that I only wanted to see Dr. K. So she worked hard to figure out the schedule and she said she would call me if it changes.

THE ENDOCRINOLOGIST APPOINTMENT
I killed some time at Jamba Juice and updated a couple friends on the first appointment before heading to the second appointment. I love being able to vent to them about Stupid-Head. Jim met me for this one. I don't really understand what an endocrinologist is for, so didn't know what to expect from this appointment. I was just hoping to leap another hurdle forward. I figured she would either be able to 1) look at my hormones and thyroid and whatever else and determine if she could help me OR 2) she would determine she couldn't help me and be able to make the case to insurance that I need to see a specialist. The biggest question Jim and I need answered right now is Am I Ovulating?

We met with Dr. T and she was very nice. I told my story and told her we were looking for direction. Because our goal is pregnancy, she didn't feel she was the one we needed to get help from. She says we need to see a fertility specialist. She will write a letter to help make the case. YAY! We got one desired result. Dr. T will also do a blood work-up on me to check all my hormones and everything so that we at least have that information. If she sees anything that she feels she can address, then we will tackle that as needed.

So, no huge successes, but at least we can still feel forward momentum. I could use prayers for emotional stamina as it has been pretty hard lately. I'm feeling pretty buried by the business of it all and need to remember the joy I am truly seeking.